The latest news from the bluegrass state.
Life as an Arsenal fan can mean some pretty nervy transfer windows, where we spend most of the time scratching our heads while we watch rival teams around us snap up everyone newsnow seems to link us with. We come out of the window with a surprise or two and some general optimism for the next season. This season is supposed to be different though, right? RIGHT?
Well I've gone and fallen into the trap of getting my hopes up about getting a few of these players... so here goes!
The highly volatile forward seems to be the perfect combination of speed, power, agility, heading strength, technical ability, and finishing prowess to check all the boxes. Cue up some PUMA sponsorship talk, and we've got ourselves quite the deal. Talk today seems to be that we've got to give up Joel Campbell to make the deal work, which will be interesting having never worn an Arsenal shirt. Joel has potential, and his ability on the world's stage is being flashed around for all to see. Personally, though, I wouldn't be too bothered to see him go provided we get a few of the other people on this list. Everybody knows what Balotelli would have to offer the club, and what a potential disaster he could be, but damnit. He's the hero we need right now AND the one we deserve. Thats right, fuck Robin, we've got Batman!
Lets just say I'd do terrible things to see a midfield trio of Pogba, Ramsey, and Ozil. I think I'd spend way over the odds to get him at Arsenal, and in times of Financial Fair Play and fiscal responsiblity and austerity we shouldn't spend that much on a player, but he's a monster in midfield. I don't think we really need a defensive midfielder, just somebody like Pogba to sit beside Ramsey and win every ball that tries to poke its way through our midfield. He'd be that, and would be smart enough alongside Ramsey to alternate going higher up the pitch and making himself dangerous when Aaron hangs back a bit, but when he see's Aaron do that, he'll hang back. If there's enough gold in Stan's vault, I say we spend a decent chunk on him. We'd forget all about that Spanish guy we all used to like over at Stamford Bridge.
XHERDAN SHAQIRI and ANTOINNE GRIEZMANN
I have a theory that Arsene loves weird names, or at least ones that are awkward to type. Now that we've all mastered the spelling of "Koscielny" we need someone to make us type a "U" when there is no "U" to be typed. Really though, if the Swiss actually wants out of Bayern, we could take him on. If he's good enough for the Bavarian world beaters, he's good enough for us! He's strong over the ball, and has pace for days. If Santi really is on his way out like the papers seem to think he is, we could do worse than taking on Xherdan.
Arsene seems to be a big admirer of the Frenchman, and with a potential negotiation with the buyback clause for Carlos Vela we could land the World Cup star on the cheap. He seems to be on the radar of PSG and Madrid as well, so all of this Carlos Vela talk is hopefully driving Vela's price up to drive our price for Griezmann down. He'd be solid cover as Wenger seems to see Chamberlain's future in the center of midfield rather than on the flanks. That would give us Theo, Podolski, Shaqiri, and Griezmann on the wings. That leaves us Ozil, Wilshere, Chamberlain, Ramsey and Pogba fighting for the three spots in midfield with Arteta and Flamini available as well if they aren't moved on this summer. Regardless, that'd be solid competition for places, and depth when the inevitable injury, tiredness, and fatigue sets in.
DALEY BLIND, DARYL JANMAAT and ASHLEY WILLIAMS
We're apparently selling our entire Spanish contingent this summer with Arsene clearly seeing the future outside of Spain. With Nacho apparently off, Thomas Vermaelen seeking first team football, and Bacary joining the newly crowned champions, we'd need another left and right back, but someone who could also slot in at center back. The Dutch pair would do exactly that, and provide depth at the back. I'd also try to pick up Ashley Williams - he'd be cheap and provide depth and quality at the back should our first choice pairing need rotation.
We'd also need a replacement for Lukasz Fabianski who has moved following the end of his contract with us. We'd bring in a second choice, so I'm sure he's not going to be terribly exciting.
Anyway, that would represent a pretty large outlay. I doubt we'll get all of them and I'm bound to be disappointed by some of these players going to other people, but they'd be quality to replace our outgoing. According to rumors, anyway, we're considering offloading or letting go of some of the fringe players - Arteta, Flamini, Nacho, Vermaelen, and Cazorla. Having seen Sagna, Fabianski, Bentdner, and Park Chu Yung (lol) move on in recent times. I'd expect some heavy reinforcements this summer. Plus, they'll all love those brand new skin tight PUMA shirts we're getting!
Branch Manager of Arsenal Kentucky.